The beginning of my journey.
There is an average amount of weight so 'they' say that most women put on during pregnancy. I took that figure and doubled it. I ate crap and used the whole 'its a big baby' and 'eating for two thing' way too far. When Tabitha was born weighing in on the small side i knew i had some hard work to do to get back into my old jeans!
I have managed since January to lose 2.5 stone through healthy diet and a few weeks on the Slim Fast Programme. I am not happy though i have the jeans on but i am still bigger than before. Pre Tabitha i was wearing a 10 on top and a 12 below, I never used to weigh myself i had no idea what i weighed. Happy with my size i could eat what i wanted and never gave it a second thought. Now i think about it all the time and could tell you from day to day what i weigh although i won't because i don't want anyone to know.
I am unhappy with my weight and i want so badly to be the way i was before i had Tabitha. Just to be able to stroll into high street stores and not have to go the back of the rail to find the bigger sizes, that look nothing like the size 8 at the front of the rail because it wasn't designed to be that big.It frustrates me and makes me angry with myself for letting it happen, for getting so carried away in the excitement of having a baby i forgot myself and what else was important. You may be thinking 'silly girl' 'weight doesn't matter' but it does, it does to me.
I want to be slim, i want to be in those tight jeans, that is what makes me happy.
So enough is enough. I went and viewed my local gyms and chose the one i felt most comfortable at, i wrote to their press office and sent a pitch.
In exchange for membership i would journal my use of their facilities and my progress to all you other mums that want to be in 'those' jeans too.I want to show that its worth the effort, worth getting off the sofa, putting down the cake and eventually strutting out for a meal with your man wearing those jeans and some massive heels.
My journey starts next week with three times weekly visits to Nuffield Heath Fitness and Wellbeing Gym.
Facing my fears-The Gym Induction.
It is time to stop the talking and start the doing. I have to say i was very very nervous about my induction to the point that i could only describe it as over coming a phobia. My stomach was churning at the thought of the people i had to talk to there, the equipment collapsing on my head, and the obvious high risk of just falling over walking up the stairs. Mentally i had every angle covered in fear. So with my sports bag packed and frankly looking a sight, they just don't go with any outfit. I headed off to the gym.
My personal trainer Chris seemed to not notice my deep set fear and just talked to me like a normal person. Inside i was eyeing every piece of equipment trying to think how on earth i was going to make it through this next hour without killing myself. After 5 minutes warming up on the exercise bike so Chris could gage how fit/unfit i was, i was actually starting to feel a bit more relaxed. People were not staring at the freakish woman with no idea what she was doing and after the first set of weights equipment was undertaken i actually was breathing like a human again. My heart was not in my mouth and i was ...shock horror enjoying it.
As we went around Chris made a program up for me that i am to do each time i attend. Its a mixture of cardio and weights and do you know what, i love it. I feel i have missed a vocation when i use the rowing machine, possibly the most fun you can have with your clothes on.
It was not all plain sailing, at the start i had explained to Chris my fear of the treadmill and he brushed it off and of course told me i'd be fine. I was terrified as he talked me through the controls and i flinched every time he waved his finger near a button convinced i would immediately fly off the back. Even after he had explained this actually can't happen, it really didn't help. I was rubbish and held on for dear life.
Not to worry though as Chris explained i can replace the treadmill in my program with the cross trainer which i love nearly as much as the rowing machine.
When i'm on the cross trainer i feel light and like i'm walking on the moon, although i have found too much 'walking on the moon' thoughts make it more likely you might fall off.
I finish off my program with abdominal crunches to remove all traces of the 'mummy tummy' and the good news all you c-section mums take note, i can't feel a thing. My stomach nerves are gone and even though the muscles are working i cannot feel the burn.
That (along with a huge personal achievement) made my day.
I heart the gym.
I knew i was overweight but it had not really occurred to me that i was unhealthy. I have never given my cholesterol a second thought or wondered if i was likely to suffer from heart disease. Part of the membership at Nuffield Health Fitness and Wellbeing is a Health MOT where they check all these things out for you. My friend had described hers as 'shocking' but deep down i thought mine would be OK. I walk, I talk, I eat salad and vegetables, I must be pretty healthy.
My downfalls were these....I'm not a smoker anymore i gave up when i was pregnant and have not started again, in the few times i have been out since Tabitha was born though I've had a few sneaky ones. They count and i lose 20 points. I dont' sleep enough, shocker, as a mum i get average 5 hrs per night this loses me lifestyle points. I don't drink my advised amount of water either i manage 3 glasses (if that) and i should have 8.
I have too much caffeine a day, this kind of cross references with my lack of sleep issue i feel.None of these results really surprised me when i thought about it, i know smoking is bad, i know i need more sleep, should drink more water etc...The results that did shock me however were these ones.
My hip/waist ratio puts me in a high risk group for heart disease and my cholesterol is higher than it should be. I was actually upset by these, i intend to be around for a longtime yet, i have a million school runs to complete and will no doubt be required to take part in parents races at sports day. I don't want to be keeling over with a heart attack.
Nadine and I came up with an action plan for myself to work towards over the next 3-6 months.
As a member on a 12 month contract you will qualify for 'Get healthy, get rewarded' if you achieve your goals at your next health check. Which should give you some added motivation to work your self as hard as you can. These rewards vary from a free months membership or 2 personal training sessions or £75 worth of free beauty treatments.There will be another Health MOT in 3 months to see if i have improved.
I won't ask for you to cross your fingers for me or wish me good luck, this one is all down to me working my arse off literally.
First things first, this
is is not my arse.
It could have been once, not even that long ago but right now its a classic case of false advertising. My sessions at the gym are however going very well. I am upping the levels on the machines to push myself harder, adding an extra 500m and trying to beat my personal best times.
The other day i even found myself asking advice from one of the personal trainers about my stomach crunches and got a great new exercise to do along with them to tone my lower stomach which is where i really need to work on after my c-section.
The big news is my body is changing. My love handles (a stupid name i've always thought, i've never looked the massive blobs of fat stuck above my hips and thought of anything close to love...) had been cupping comfortably into the palms of my hand but now they are smoothing out and sloping down to my hips.
Also when i am walking i can feel the beginnings of my thighs brushing past each other rather than the usual squided together meeting point.
So....I have brought new jeans, hoorah!
They are black skinny ones (a few sizes bigger than i would have liked) but i feel sexy in them like i want to wear heels and be a bit slutty. I can feel my old confidence creeping back a tiny bit, as if i can walk taller and look people in the eye more often. I am slowly coming back to life as a woman and it feels good.
Hooray for Mummy!
I haven't been boring you all with weekly weigh ins, mainly because i dread having to tell you all i've failed every week so decided to only blog when i reach a goal.
This morning i reached my first goal of losing 1/2 stone since i started at the gym!
Towel or no towel?
What type of changing room user are you?
Since using the Nuffield Fitness and Wellbeing Gym i have been observing the habits of the womens changing rooms. Not in a weird pervy way of course but its always quite fascinated me how different peoples comfort levels are about being naked in front of people.
I'm not a prude at all and quite like to have a good gander at a nice fit body of any sex and even a butchers at the not so perfect always helps keep your insecurities in check. Oh come on everyone has a side ways look now and again....
Sometimes i find myself taken aback by peoples 'strange' behaviour.
Sometimes i find myself taken aback by peoples 'strange' behaviour.
Yesterday a fully clothed woman wearing her coat returned to the changing rooms found her friend who was totally starkers and drying her private bits in the communal area and had a fully blown conversation. My brain just computes this as wrong. Am i wrong?
See if that was me i'd have stopped drying myself covered myself in the towel had the conversation and then resumed drying.
Another woman come to open her locker after her shower and literally put her fanny in my face last week. She was totally naked, just holding her towel in her hand, untrimmed and centimeters from my face!
It might be me, maybe i am a prude but if you've got a towel just use it even if its just a little bit?!
If you really must dry every inch of your lower regions with that much enthusiasm then grab yourself a changing cubicle, for the love of God.
Saying all of this i have an admission to make...
The other day i found myself surrounded my a group of elderly ladies, all somewhat larger ladies and i stripped right off, blinding them with my 34 years and resent weight loss. I left feeling a million dollars.
Free Day Pass....
I always thought i was not a gym person. I would disbelieve people who said they enjoyed sweating away pumping weights or using rowing machines. I was wrong and i don't admit that often, I get it now i really do, i feel so energized when i leave after a workout, so pleased with myself as i watch my shape change.
My irrational hang up about killing myself using equipment and making a fool of myself were irradiated in half an hour and now i have a lifetime ahead of me with the confidence to use the gym.
I really feel that this is something i will do forever now, even when i get the jeans back on. Loving the buzz and enjoy the challenge of pushing myself a little further each time.
Nuffield Health Fitness and Wellbeing are aware many people are unsure of the gym environment and are confident in their facilities being second to none that they offer free day passes for you to see how you get on....I wish i had known this years ago and not wasted time carrying my gym phobia around.
Why not find your local Nuffield and get down there for a day, try it out rather than dismissing it as 'not for you' like i did for years. You won't know what your missing untill you do.
Click on the button below.
Keep on pushing...
New year is always filled with resolutions for the forth coming twelve months, mine is no different. I am setting myself a few goals and making sure i have to stick to them by blabbing about them on social media sites meaning there is no way out!
Last year i took part in the Race For Life 5k in memory of my brother Matthew. I talked about my experience in an article with Top Sante, it was my kick start to losing weight last year and i'm planning the same this year. However to challenge myself i am signing up for the 10k!
Keeping my focus on being fit enough to complete the run will help to keep my motivation going as i continue with my Nuffield Health and Fitness gym sponsorship, my weekly routines and new healthy diet.
If you are thinking of losing weight this year then i cannot stress enough how having an event to get you moving can help you achieve great things.
I am taking part in a support group with some other bloggers being run by Liz Jarvis at Living with kids. We all intend to lose weight and get healthy this year and are supporting each other via email and social media sites to keep eachother motivated. So if you are on twitter and see the #newyearnewbody tag, thats us discussing our goals and achievements.
On Wednesday i have a review with my personal trainer at the gym to see how i can push myself harder to achieve a better fitness level for the run.
I'm really hoping he takes it easy on me!